Khatra hai mujhe, mujhi se

A poem by Samyak Shah

Khatra sa hai mujhe, darr iss baat ka hai 

Nuksaan mein main hu, lekin isme dosh bhi usi ka hai 

Itna kamzor hu main ki darta hu apne aap se 

Koshish yahi hai ki samajh na jaau main ke mujhe khatra hai mujhi se 

Jeevan mein kuch aata hai, toh bas ilzaam lagaana 

kyunki nahi chahta main khud ko bataana 

Kamzor woh nahi jiska maine naam liya zubaan se 

Kamzor woh hai jo darta hai apne aap se. 

Aankh khol ke dekho, toh samjhoge ki tumhaari khud ki asliyat kya hai 

Dusro ka naam lena chodoge, tab pata chalega, 

Yeh parinaam bhi khud ki hi galtiyon ka hai 

Most people do not know their true self and that is a leading reason why most people have developed the habit of blaming someone or the other for the things happening in their life (which might not have anything to do with the person they blamed). 

Because the person is not ready to accept his/her true self, how can we expect them to accept their flaws and mistakes. 

Your true self is like a wild animal which needs to be tamed. You'll be scared at first, looking at the way it behaves, but believe me; once you learn to accept it and love it, you'll see that you were scared for nothing. Accept yourself, and see how the world will start appearing much more simple to you. The one who is scared of meeting his/her own true self, is the one who'll be scared from the world, who'll be insecure about anything and everything in their life, but once you've met your inner self, the insecurities and problems will be reduced by a great extent.

Do not be scared of yourself.......  

Epiphany

Sometimes we forget to be thankful for what all we have received. We need a reality check to see that we all are living a luxurious life in certain aspects of our life. We don’t always gazillion dollars of money in our bank account, we don’t always need to have a security around us to reassure our celebrity status, and we don’t require big ass cars in the parking are to show how much we have earned because there are certain things that cannot be purchased or leased. These things just need to be experienced to make us realize that we are way more richer than we think we are.

The best place or situation that helps us in striking epiphanies and biggest life changing decisions is a place that not all people visit (those people are lost). This place is the Galla or the place where people go to buy cigarettes, paan and what not. The place is like a heaven in its own way, by just being there you are able to have conversations that you can’t even have in a natural surrounding or in an educational surrounding. The knowledge acquired and realized is way more valuable than some big ass company’s CEO’s monthly salary slip. The 2 best times that actually possess the ability to make you think about what you want to do, are: Late night talks and Galla talks. If had on a regular basis, you’ll be benefited in ways that you wouldn’t have thought of.  This blog is a result of one such epiphany inspiring galla talk.


I was just casually having maggi noodles with one of my friend and we were talking about school results and how we had gotten beating from either of our parents (if at all) and this brought us to a brink of a new topic of discussion. She started talking about how her parents had gotten divorced when she was at a very young age. We all have heard sad stories about how the kids whose parents get divorced turn out to have some or other sort of problems, but if you look at her and talk to her, you might not even realize that there is a problem (if at all there is). While she narrated all the funny incidents, I somewhere realized that despite having seen her parents getting divorced at young age (she might not even would’ve comprehended what it was, but still) she is still living like a champ, and honestly, I have never seen her complain or throw any sort of tantrums (not that I know of) and this made me realize that how neglectful I had been sometimes with my parents, or my friends and many more people for that matter.

I realized one thing after that conversation: I needed to be more thankful (and actually express it in words) to the people who have helped me in my life in whatsoever minor or major way possible because without any external influence and response, it is difficult for a person to develop normally.This is the day that I realized what ‘NOT TAKING THINGS FOR GRANTED’ meant. I realized that while I am on my journey to inspire someone to improve their life, I shouldn’t forget those who have inspired me and helped me whenever I was going through a bad phase (sometimes despite not having any personal gains by helping me).

I’m thankful to all those who have inspired me and I’m grateful to all those who have gotten inspired by me (if at all) and I’m thankful to my friend for making me realize what being rich actually meant.

“A simple act of caring creates an endless ripple, that comes back to you” 

(the people who have seen this commercial will know what value this statement holds and how is it related to this blog)


- Samyak Shah  

Know yourself

I am a second year Bachelor’s degree student who is (more or less) struggling to prove himself (because that’s what all our lives are about: What have you done?).

I frequently sit down with my brother and sister for talks (which we affectionately like to call counselling sessions) because I put forward all my doubts, troubles, problems and questions which then we together try and solve. For the first few times, it had been amazingly beneficial because I realized ke in what all places was I not giving my 100%. I slowly started moving towards improving myself and then slowly, I realized that I wasn’t actually improving, I was actually just trying to please my brother and sister (my whole family for that matter) because whatever I was working on was something that they had recommended. I hadn’t chosen what all I wanted to work on, they had advised that I CAN improve in these XYZ areas and I mistakenly had considered only those areas. Now, you all may have heard the saying ‘KNOW YOURSELF AND YOU SHALL KNOW THE WORLD’ and that’s when it hit me: I don’t necessarily need to talk to them if I can just ask myself certain questions, then it is quite possible that I can come up with a lot of answers.

Thus; I started to confront myself and I realized that I was capable of answering and revealing my deepest fears, regrets, dreams and goals to myself. I wasn’t afraid of myself anymore. I powered myself. Once I began to know myself, I realized what all I had been missing out on. I truly started enjoying life like an 19 year old boy should. And then I realized that I was indeed special because I was no more afraid to speak and act my heart out, I wasn’t afraid about the consequences, all I ever cared about is ‘whether I had given my 100% or not?’ and ‘whether I had enjoyed doing it or not?’. I shed all my previous masks and lives I had surrounded myself with. I finally became capable of doing what I wanted to and what I always thought of, and now I did it without a fear in this world (although in certain places and incidents I do need consent).

What I want you all to do is ask yourself certain questions:

1. Who am I? (answer this without using any examples of specific people in your life)

2. What do I want? (do not write: I want money or I want to get rich [that is a by-product], write what you’d like to do or what you’d like to possess when you have reached a certain age in life)

3. What are your triggers? (can be anything: what things you fear or what aspects make want to scream?)

4. List down all your achievements (anything that is notable enough, like: any national or state level competitions you’ve won etc.)

5. Who are THEY? (list down all sorts of aspects [including people or groups of people] who have an indirect control on how you behave)

6. What is it that I truly want for yourself in life?

7. What exactly do I want to do? (make a career or life from what you love to do. Example: Loving your S.O. is good but you can’t make a career out of it.)

8. What is it that makes me happy? (include the names of places, experiences, people etc. that make you happy)

Answer this questions, ask yourself all these questions and if done wholeheartedly and with complete honesty, you’ll realize that you’re actually happy and all the masks you carry will drop and you’ll meet your true self. Do not be afraid of anything that happens during this journey of self discovery. You may cry, you may want to kill someone, but remember that at the end of this journey is true happiness. Once you know yourself or start to get to know yourself, you’ll see what a beautiful life it is.

- Samyak Shah

     

Look forward

The ghosts do not haunt me,

My failures do not taunt me

Because now I am only looking forward,

It's time that they accept that I am not a coward

It took some time to realize that no one cares,

Because their fear is such, that no one dares

Moments like these make you feel empowered yet helpless,

You may know everything, but you'll still remain restless

Sometimes it's only about accepting the flow,

Because problems will be there, wherever you go.

These are the ghosts that will haunt you, no matter where you are

You'll make it out alive, with nothing but a scar

- Samyak Shah

Baah ko baah mein rehne de, 

lamha ye bhi guzar jaayega, 

Shaayad iske baad hum rahe na rahe, 

bas apna yeh lamha reh jaayega

Tootenge hum, aur ek ek tukda nazar ke saamne bikhar jaayega 

Kaanch ke tukde ki tarah hai ye

Yuhi rehne denge toh raah mein chubhega, 

Sametne ki koshish ki toh zakhm sa ban ke reh jaayega

- Samyak Shah

I don't know

I don’t know who I am

Whether I will be alive tomorrow or not.

People question my existence,

But still I am breathing.

Not knowing what will happen the next moment

I keep travelling

Not knowing what my destination is.

I never ask questions about my path

I blindly follow it.

I have an intuition that my goal is somewhere around,

Yet it seems nowhere to be found

I will go through all of it without giving a damn,

I don’t know who I am

- Samyak Shah